Mark Howitt's Chess Coaching

[Mark Howitt]

Pictures of Mark Howitt Chess Training

I taught my niece a quick chess lesson yesterday. My nephew is only 3 yet wanted to learn too so watched and moved the pieces around a little.

This was after the meal at Healds Hall- full review to follow probably today yet it was 8/10. Have to say though the meal went on a bit longer then I thought- not restaurant's fault. Hence I was a bit tired. Travelled to Oakwell Hall after that which I did not expect. Had to walk to Oakwell Hall then find a room. Did so- assistants there were fine.



So because of my tiredness it was only a quick session. My niece is only 5. She picked up how the pieces moved pretty quickly. I demonstrated how the queen, rook and bishop moved. Showed her on empty board. She moved them around. Picked it up pretty quick. My nephew did a little too.

So anyway... tired after this. Guess it takes a while to digest food had been out last night.

My niece had a question though. In a phone call earlier she said she thought she could beat her brother. I asked if she thought she could beat me. She said she thought she could. I told her she couldn't...

Anyway, the chess lesson was over. "But there has to be more to it than that... what's the aim?"

"Well there are the black pieces and the white pieces. And the goal is to kill the enemy king."

I told her her mother could get her a chess board if she was interested.

[Mark Howitt]

Pictures are on my website- thought putting on here yet was bit slow...

[Mark Howitt]

Very likely I've found a good club to play for in Hudds chess league. Training continues.

[Jon Mahony]

Very likely I've found a good club to play for in Hudds chess league. Training continues.

Be sure to let us know when they've absolutely, positively locked you down and the other 6 bidders, fighting for your playing services, have been given the bad news...

... because I really, really can't wait to hear

[Mark Howitt]

There will be more to come

[Jon Mahony]

There will be more to come

Have you noticed you talk to yourself 85% of the time on here?

... there's a reason.

[Mark Howitt]

Yep there's a reason why I've got over 450,000 views on my share writing and over 189,000 views on my blog too... come back to me when you can do those numbers.

[Jon Mahony]

Yep there's a reason why I've got over 450,000 views on my share writing and over 189,000 views on my blog too... come back to me when you can do those numbers.

I neither write nor blog, so you will be waiting a while.

I do however note, your continual spamming on this forum is starting to wear a little thin and I don't think I'll be alone in this opinion.

[John Upham]

Yep there's a reason why I've got over 450,000 views on my share writing and over 189,000 views on my blog too... come back to me when you can do those numbers.

I neither write nor blog, so you will be waiting a while.

I do however note, your continual spamming on this forum is starting to wear a little thin and I don't think I'll be alone in this opinion.

I'd go further and suggest that MHs continued inane drivel is bringing this place into disrepute. CH could act decisively and direct MHs rubbish to /dev/null.

[Mark Howitt]

Over 190,000 views on https://markhowitt.blogspot.com/ now... more to come...

[Jon Mahony]

Over 190,000 views on https://markhowitt.blogspot.com/ now... more to come...

Yes the Wayback machine gets a lot of hits...

Hang on... this is current?! My apologies, I thought it was designed using HTML circa 2004.

Though to be fair make that 190,001 views now, because I just clicked it for a nosey.

[Mark Howitt]

Guys.........

Can't sleep atm...

So have to tell u the notorious Mark Howitt did make a return in the glamour venue of Honley Liberal club for his first compeititve OTB match in 15 years.

I'd like to say it was a black win in the style of Tal but I did make a few mistakes which hopefully I won't make again.

Big thanks to Leo Keely for the free analysis!

[Mark Howitt]

I said-a hip, hop, the hippie, the hippie
To the hip hip hop-a you don't stop the rock
It to the bang-bang boogie, say up jump the boogie
To the rhythm of the boogie, the beat
Now what you hear is not a test: I'm rappin' to the beat
And me, the groove, and my friends are gonna try to move your feet
See, I am Wonder Mike, and I'd like to say hello
To the black, to the white, the red
And the brown, the purple and yellow
But first I gotta bang bang the boogie to the boogie
Say up jump the boogie to the bang bang boogie
Let's rock, you don't stop
Rock the riddle that will make your body rock
Well, so far you've heard my voice, but I brought two friends along
And next on the mike is my man Hank, come on Hank, sing that song
Check it out, I'm the C-A-S-AN, the O-V-A and the rest is F-L-Y
You see, I go by the code of the doctor of the mix and these reasons I'll tell you why
You see I'm six foot one and I'm tons of fun and I dress to a D
You see I got more clothes than Muhammad Ali and I dress so viciously
I got bodyguards, I got two big cars, that definitely ain't the whack
I got a Lincoln continental and a sunroof Cadillac
So after school, I take a dip in the pool, which is really on the wall
I got a color TV so I can see the Knicks play basketball
Hear me talking 'bout checkbooks, credit cards, more money than a sucker could ever spend
But I wouldn't give a sucker or a bum from the Rucker, not a dime 'til I made it again
Everybody go: Hotel, motel, whatcha gonna do today (Say what?)
'Cause I'ma get a fly girl, gonna get some spank and drive off in a def OJ
Everybody go: Hotel, motel, Holiday Inn
You see, if your girl starts acting up, then you take her friend
Uh Master Gee, my mellow?
It's on you so what you gonna do?
Well it's on and on and on, on and on
The beat don't stop until the break of dawn
I said a M-A-S, a T-E-R, a G with a double E
I said I go by the unforgettable name of the man they call the Master Gee
Well, my name is known all over the world
By all the foxy ladies and the pretty girls
I'm going down in history
As the baddest rapper there ever could be
Now I'm feeling the highs and you're feeling the lows
The beat starts getting into your toes
You start popping your fingers and stomping your feet
And moving your body while you're sitting in your seat
And then damn, you start doing the freak
I said damn, right outta your seat
Then you throw your hands high in the air
You're rocking to the rhythm, shake your derriere
Ya rockin' to the beat without a care
With the sureshot MCs for the affair
Now, I'm not as tall as the rest of the gang
But I rap to the beat just the same
I got a little face, and a pair of brown eyes
All I'm here to do, ladies, is hypnotize
Singing on an' an' on an' on, on an' on
The beat don't stop until the break of dawn
Singing on an' an' on an' on, on an' on
Like a hot party the pop the pop the pop dibbie dibbie
Pop the pop, pop, you don't dare stop
Come alive y'all, gimme whatcha got
I guess by now you can take a hunch
And find that I am the baby of the bunch
But that's okay, I still keep in stride
'Cos all I'm here to do is just wiggle your behind
Singin' on'n'n'on'n'on n'on
The beat don't stop until the break of dawn
Singin' on'n'n'on'n'on on'n'on
Rock rock, y'all, throw it on the floor
I'm gonna freak ya here I'm gonna freak you there
I'm gonna move you outta this atmosphere
'Cos I'm one of a kind and I'll shock your mind
I'll put TNT tickin' in your behind
I said one, two, three, four, come on, girls, get on the floor
A-come alive, y'all, a-gimme whatcha got
'Cos I'm guaranteed to make you rock
I said one, two, three, four, tell me, Wonder Mike
What are you waiting for?
I said a hip hop the hippie to the hippie
To the hip hip hop and you don't stop
The rock it to the bang bang the boogie
Say up jump the boogie, dig the rhythm of the boogie, the beat
Skiddlee beebop a we rock a scooby doo
And guess what, America: we love you
'Cause ya rock and ya roll with so much soul
You could rock 'til you're a hundred and one years old
I don't mean to brag I don't mean to boast
But we like hot butter on a breakfast toast
Rock it up, uh, baby bubbah
Baby bubbah to the boogie the bang bang the boogie
To the beat beat, it's so unique
Come on, everybody, and dance to the beat
A hip hop the hippie the hippie
To the hip hip hop and you don't stop
The rock it out baby boppa to the boogity bang bang
Boogie to the boogie, the beat
I said I can't wait 'til the end of the week
When I'm rappin' to the rhythm of a groovy beat
An attempt to raise your body heat
Just blow your mind so that you can't speak
To do a thing but a rock and shuffle your feet
And let it change up to a dance called the freak
And when ya finally do come into your rhythmic beat
Rest a little while so ya don't get weak
I know a man named Hank
He has more rhymes than a serious bank
So come on Hank, uh, sing that song
To the rhythm of the boogie the bang bang the bong
Well, I'm imp the dimp, the ladies pimp
The women fight for my delight
But I'm the grandmaster with the three MCs
That shock the house for the young ladies
And when you come inside, into the front
You do the freak, spank, and do the bump
And when the sucker MCs try to prove a point
We're treacherous trio, we're the serious joint
A-from sun-to-sun and from day-to-day
I sit down and write a brand new rhyme
Because they say that miracles never cease
I've created a devastating masterpiece
I'm gonna rock the mike 'til you can't resist
Everybody, I say, it goes like this
Well, I was comin' home late one dark afternoon
A reporter stopped me for a interview
She said she's heard stories and she's heard fables
That I'm vicious on the mic and the turntables
This young reporter, I did adore
So I rocked a vicious rhyme like I never did before
She said, "Damn, fly guy, I'm in love with you!
The Casanova legend must have been true!"
I said, "By the way, baby, what's your name?"
Said, "I go by the name Lois Lane
And you could be my boyfriend, you surely can
Just let me quit my boyfriend called Superman"
I said, "He's a fairy, I do suppose
Flyin' through the air in pantyhose
He may be very sexy or even cute
But he looks like a sucker in a blue and red suit"
I said, "You need a man who's got finesse
And his whole name across his chest
He may be able to fly all through the night
But can he rock a party 'til the early light?
He can't satisfy you with his little worm
But I can bust you out with my super sperm!"
I gon' do it, I gon' do it, I gon' do it, do it, do it
And I'm here, and I'm there, I'm Big Bank Hank, I'm everywhere
Just throw your hands up in the air
And party hardy like you just don't care
Let's do it, don't stop y'all
A-tick a-tock, y'all, you don't stop!
Go hotel, motel

[Carl Hibbard]

Warning issued for posting more nonsense.

[Mark Howitt]

Having a look at the Yorkshire Chess Association results... was thinking about chess quite a lot. Was stewarding but will play in Yorks league this season