Chess Limericks
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Re: Chess Limericks
I once played the anti Meran
Of this opening I was a fan
The game got complicated
With the theory I knew out dated
and ended up an also-ran
Of this opening I was a fan
The game got complicated
With the theory I knew out dated
and ended up an also-ran
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Re: Chess Limericks
All right, you win. But I'd prefer "winner" to "winning". Edit: but see below.David Robertson wrote:No, no, and thrice no!David Sedgwick wrote:How about "beneficiary" instead of "recipient"?
I despair. Why do people, by no means just David Sedgwick, have such a tin ear for metre - for even for rhythm? 'Beneficiary' is a hexasyllable composed of an anapest and, arguably, a dactyl. It would make a butchery of most lines of verse. You might just make it work by elision (slurring):
Beneficiary David Sedgwick ...but that loses 'award' of course
Final version (I hope):
Award winning David Sedgwick
Was regarded by some as a brick
But divers were those
Who chose to oppose
Miles used to call him a prick
If I have, it won't be because of the limericks.John McKenna wrote:I trust that David has not lost his award, already.
Last edited by David Sedgwick on Mon Aug 03, 2015 9:07 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Re: Chess Limericks
Either works metrically. But there's a difference.David Sedgwick wrote:All right, you win. But I'd prefer "winner" to "winning"
If I wanted my poem to sound like an announcement from the local Rotary Club, I'd use "Award winner"
But if I wanted my poem to sound like a poem, I'd use "Award-winning".
Why? Because a poem should try to rhyme all along the line, not just line-by-line. Here, the "in-in" of 'winning' achieves that.
Listen (sic) to how Dante does it - easier in Italian than English, but nevertheless...
Nel mezzo del cammin di nostra vita
Mi ritrovai in una selva oscura
Che la diritta via ero smarrita
Note the internal rhymes 'nel/del' in line 1; and 'diritta/smarrita' in line 3
We can't be as musical in our verse as Dante. But we can be alert to what we're trying to achieve when we compose verse, even a limerick.
Hence, far, very far from Dante, listen to the sounds generated by this famous limerick. The sounds and internal rhymes amplify the comic effect:
While Titian was mixing rose madder
His model posed nude on a ladder
Her position to Titian
Resembled coition
So he ran up the ladder and 'ad her
Last edited by David Robertson on Mon Aug 03, 2015 9:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Chess Limericks
Okay, I concede again. See the edit above.
The line "Who chose to oppose" was composed with your point in mind.
The line "Who chose to oppose" was composed with your point in mind.
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Re: Chess Limericks
The thread started off as light-hearted,
but the fun has long since departed.
If layman’s your speak,
you’re exposed as word-weak.
And the wordsmiths will leave you outsmarted.
but the fun has long since departed.
If layman’s your speak,
you’re exposed as word-weak.
And the wordsmiths will leave you outsmarted.
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Re: Chess Limericks
There aren't many words which rhyme with Dunfermline. (And I don't think I've found any, to be honest...). So this is the best I can do for now. (Not only am I late in handing in the assignment, but I've ignored some of the constraints... )David Robertson wrote:Yes, to both. So now we can get to work.Alistair Campbell wrote:So, would Cowdenbeath be an example of an anapest? What about Dunfermline? An amphibrach perhaps?
First, a trimeter of amphibrachs
There was a young wife from Dunfermline
I'll leave the second line to you
Then we can switch to anapests in lines 3 and 4
For the lad underneath
Came from Cowdenbeath
I have a final line. But this is a family forum
There was a young bride from Dunfermline
Who favoured an outrageous hemline
Said her groom through grit' teeth
"This is not Cowdenbeath
Your dress length should follow the trendline"
Re: Chess Limericks
Interesting. So you rhyme the syllable 'line' in Dunfermline with 'sign', not 'sin'?
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Re: Chess Limericks
Well, no I don't actually. No-one does, outside of desperate attempts to make it rhyme....David Robertson wrote:Interesting. So you rhyme the syllable 'line' in Dunfermline with 'sign', not 'sin'?
Re: Chess Limericks
Rhymes for Dunfermline are hard to find. But if a rhyme can be found for 'Birmingham' - and it can - then most things are possible. OK, here's my 'Dunfermline' attempt, suitably laced with innuendo and double-entendre; and, with a nod to Edward Lear, a bit of nonsense too
There was a young lass from Dunfermline
Heard sounds down below most concernin'
Said the lad underneath
"Och", I'm from Cowdenbeath
And they'll cease once my worm has done squirmin'
There was a young lass from Dunfermline
Heard sounds down below most concernin'
Said the lad underneath
"Och", I'm from Cowdenbeath
And they'll cease once my worm has done squirmin'
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Re: Chess Limericks
The victories of Grandmaster Crisan
left some people deep in suspicion.
Well, it's been fourteen years,
but at last he's in tears
when he looks at his profile's condition.
https://ratings.fide.com/card.phtml?event=1201271
left some people deep in suspicion.
Well, it's been fourteen years,
but at last he's in tears
when he looks at his profile's condition.
https://ratings.fide.com/card.phtml?event=1201271
If you want a picture of the future, imagine a QR code stamped on a human face — forever.
Re: Chess Limericks
There was a chess poet called Francis
Who was good at taking his chances.
In a team he could play
If he brooked no delay
And let the club know what his stance is.
Who was good at taking his chances.
In a team he could play
If he brooked no delay
And let the club know what his stance is.
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Re: Chess Limericks
'Tis National Limerick Day
So let all the poets display
Their wit and their puns
But please don't post ones
Which have too many syllables in the last line and don't scan properly.
So let all the poets display
Their wit and their puns
But please don't post ones
Which have too many syllables in the last line and don't scan properly.
Re: Chess Limericks
The matter was settled up-thread
Where the Gaelic experts have said
That it's not 'lim-er-ick'
Instead 'lim-rick' you pick
So your first line won't scan, prop'ly read
( )
Where the Gaelic experts have said
That it's not 'lim-er-ick'
Instead 'lim-rick' you pick
So your first line won't scan, prop'ly read
( )
Last edited by David Robertson on Thu May 12, 2016 5:53 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Re: Chess Limericks
On National Limerick Day
Francis returned to the fray.
He posted a line
That scanned just fine,
'Til he hit an H, not an A.
Francis returned to the fray.
He posted a line
That scanned just fine,
'Til he hit an H, not an A.