Post
by Paul McKeown » Sun Jul 25, 2010 12:56 pm
The benighted Jonathan Kay of Staines and Athenaeum chess clubs, once had the misfortune in the Banks League to play an opponent of annoyance great. An evening's niggle, sigh and shrug, left poor old Jonny the last amongst his comrades still engaged in the hurly burly. Proud possessor of not only an extra piece, but a handsome three pawns more, to boot, it was understandable that he wondered when, if and how his antagonist might grace him with a (never too late) concession. Suddenly, bolt from the blue, this woeful and gangrel fellow flung his queen onto a square adjacent to Jonny's king, and bellowed, "Checkmate!" Irritated beyond the point of fury with the ill manners of this uncouth oaf, Jonny, without troubling himself to examine the position with care, grabbed his coat and stormed out. Onlookers aghast were all, the king so sorely insulted having not merely one but a fully royal choice of two squares on which it could take refuge. Those amongst the gathered throng that might be considered mates leapt into pursuit, but it availed them none, Jonny having found instant solace in the Scotch bottle offered up in some dank backstreet bothy. On their return to the shambles, the Orc then proceeded to harangue them one and all as to the unwarranted interference of those who had taken it upon themselves to search for the ill starred Jonathan.