Handshakes
-
- Posts: 664
- Joined: Thu Apr 12, 2007 4:10 pm
- Location: Abingdon
Handshakes
Is there ever a good reason for not shaking hands after the game?
-
- Posts: 9085
- Joined: Sat May 30, 2009 5:18 pm
- Location: Oldbury, Worcestershire
Re: Handshakes
The opponent's hands have been amputated?Phil Neatherway wrote: ↑Thu Aug 29, 2019 7:04 pmIs there ever a good reason for not shaking hands after the game?
-
- Posts: 4653
- Joined: Tue Nov 18, 2008 9:26 pm
Re: Handshakes
The opponent's hands just recently closely escaped amputation?
-
- Posts: 1207
- Joined: Thu May 01, 2008 11:35 am
Re: Handshakes
I recently played a boy aged about 10 who spent much of the game with a finger stuck up one or other nostril
https://beauchess.blogspot.com/
https://beauchess.blogspot.com/
-
- Posts: 664
- Joined: Thu Apr 12, 2007 4:10 pm
- Location: Abingdon
Re: Handshakes
I guess I should have known better than to expect any serious answers.
-
- Posts: 3338
- Joined: Fri Nov 14, 2008 8:27 pm
Re: Handshakes
All sound serious, and entirely valid enough to me. What were you thinking of?
-
- Posts: 2069
- Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2014 1:28 pm
- Location: Morecambe, Europe
Re: Handshakes
I'll give a serious answer.
There is a much respected player who is thalidomide and has seriously underdeveloped hands. I have played him a few times and, as I recall, I don't think we have ever shaken hands - the physical difficulties of achieving this naturally being a major difficulty. The same effect of a handshake (well, actually no - the superior effects) are achieved by the genial conversation before and after the game that make the gesture of the handshake unnecessary.
I have worried about this and indeed shortly after my return to chess from a long absence I sought guidance from another competitor: I was anxious not to offend and didn't know whether the offer of a hand would be treating my opponent normally, or emphasising his difficulties. I think what happens (I honestly don't know what happens, which I suppose is a good sign) is that we smile and wish each other a good game. Anyway, it seems to go OK.
There is a much respected player who is thalidomide and has seriously underdeveloped hands. I have played him a few times and, as I recall, I don't think we have ever shaken hands - the physical difficulties of achieving this naturally being a major difficulty. The same effect of a handshake (well, actually no - the superior effects) are achieved by the genial conversation before and after the game that make the gesture of the handshake unnecessary.
I have worried about this and indeed shortly after my return to chess from a long absence I sought guidance from another competitor: I was anxious not to offend and didn't know whether the offer of a hand would be treating my opponent normally, or emphasising his difficulties. I think what happens (I honestly don't know what happens, which I suppose is a good sign) is that we smile and wish each other a good game. Anyway, it seems to go OK.
-
- Posts: 5832
- Joined: Wed Apr 30, 2008 12:28 pm
Re: Handshakes
"There is a much respected player who is thalidomide and has seriously underdeveloped hands"
Assuming it's the same one I'm thinking of, he is so genial that you could possibly ask. He once said to me, "Thanks for arbiting - I would give you a round of applause if I could." Even I was lost for words.
I assume Phil is asking if he can refuse to shake hands as his opponent was so obnoxious, he doesn't want to...
Assuming it's the same one I'm thinking of, he is so genial that you could possibly ask. He once said to me, "Thanks for arbiting - I would give you a round of applause if I could." Even I was lost for words.
I assume Phil is asking if he can refuse to shake hands as his opponent was so obnoxious, he doesn't want to...
-
- Posts: 1915
- Joined: Tue Mar 17, 2015 2:44 pm
Re: Handshakes
Handshakes are, to some degree, a culturally-sensitive matter and I'd suggest that men might sensibly pause for thought if playing a woman with a different cultural background. Separate to this, I've occasionally encountered OCD sufferers who definitely don't want to share my germs - or yours!
-
- Posts: 741
- Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 9:10 pm
Re: Handshakes
If I've had one of my fountain pen accidents, I offer a fist bump instead.
-
- Posts: 5832
- Joined: Wed Apr 30, 2008 12:28 pm
Re: Handshakes
I'm too lazy to look it up, but I think it says something like shake hands or make a suitable gesture, obviously the latter is a matter of interpretation!
-
- Posts: 930
- Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2008 2:10 am
Re: Handshakes
By coincidence this question mirrors a conversation Jack, Adam Taylor and myself had at the pub this evening.
I voiced that there is approximately one person ( or somewhere between 1 and 3 on a bad day) who's hand I wouldn't shake were I paired with him. I think my grounds are reasonable:
He blagged a free copy of my book off me, 'bragged' to anyone who would listen that he then made a point of not reading the book, and out of irritation that the book had good reviews on 'Amazon books' gave it a lousy review ( under the pseudonym of 'Dan' until Danny Gormally gave him a mouthful, at which point he changed to 'Matthew'). If that were all that this unsavoury character had done across me I would probably let it go, but believe me it is not!
I voiced that there is approximately one person ( or somewhere between 1 and 3 on a bad day) who's hand I wouldn't shake were I paired with him. I think my grounds are reasonable:
He blagged a free copy of my book off me, 'bragged' to anyone who would listen that he then made a point of not reading the book, and out of irritation that the book had good reviews on 'Amazon books' gave it a lousy review ( under the pseudonym of 'Dan' until Danny Gormally gave him a mouthful, at which point he changed to 'Matthew'). If that were all that this unsavoury character had done across me I would probably let it go, but believe me it is not!
-
- Posts: 2074
- Joined: Tue Nov 22, 2011 9:23 pm
- Location: Harrogate
Re: Handshakes
Answering the original question; I think that if during the game your opponent's behaviour had been sufficiently obnoxious and/ or unsportsmanlike to cause offence then you would be within your rights to refuse to shake hands. However I don't think its something that should be done lightly.
I've never been in such a situation myself but I was reminded of my best friends in chess telling me the story of the one time he refused to shake hands with an opponent after a game. On careful reflection the (understandable) reason does not belong on a public forum.
I've never been in such a situation myself but I was reminded of my best friends in chess telling me the story of the one time he refused to shake hands with an opponent after a game. On careful reflection the (understandable) reason does not belong on a public forum.
Controller - Yorkshire League
Chairman - Harrogate Chess Club
All views expressed entirely my own
Chairman - Harrogate Chess Club
All views expressed entirely my own
-
- Posts: 552
- Joined: Sat Aug 07, 2010 5:51 pm
Re: Handshakes
Way back I think we shook hands only at the end of the game. Now it's often three times: 1 on arrival at the board, 2 just before the clock is started, 3 at the end of the game. Away from chess I think some other nationalities, particularly the French, are more frequent shakers than the British.